How To Be Funny And Attract Women

Every time I see a guy who has success with women, he’s always making them laugh. I’m not a naturally funny guy, in fact I rarely if ever make people laugh. How can I become funny so that I can get women interested in me?

Gideon M.

Alright Gid, listen up. There are many, many ways to be funny. Let’s list them.

You could go for physical humor! Nothing like a little slapstick to liven up the day and make them ladies laugh and laugh and laugh!

Step 1: You’re going to need to procure lots of pie tins, shaving cream, and a place to hide all of them so that no one knows they’re coming.

Step 2: Smack yourself in the face with shaving cream pies repeatedly. Laughs! Glorious laughs!

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You could go for standup style humor instead. This one is even easier!

All you have to do is pick your favorite standup comic and memorize every joke he or she has ever done. Super easy! Just get on youtube, search whoever you like, and get memorizing!

Then, when you’re talking to a woman you want to woo, just start reciting all the comic’s jokes as fast as you can. The faster you go, the more funny it gets! Faster makes it work better!

Don’t worry about issues like “comedic timing” or “waiting for her to laugh” or even “is she listening or did she walk over to the other side of the bar and is trying desperately to avoid eye contact with you as you ramble off your 14th minute of Steven Wright material at the empty space where she used to be.”

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Like I said, don’t worry about it!

Hell, you could even go for some of that self deprecating humor.

Just bring a chainsaw or other cutting instrument of your choice to the preferred woman-meeting location, and begin by sawing/hacking/clipping/otherwise maiming parts of your body off in front of her.

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Women go wild for a man who knows how to make fun of himself, so if you can successfully cut your arm off at the elbow while she looks on in amazement, she’ll practically melt into your arms!

If you can get her to bend over and give you your freshly severed hand, and then still be able to deliver the line “thanks for giving me a *hand*”, then congratulations, you’ve won at life forever, please step forward to receive your prize.

Or, y’know, you could just stop worrying about it.

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Women don’t really care if you’re funny or not. Women care about having a good time with you. you are the only one who cares whether you’re making her laugh.

If you can’t feel good about the time you’re spending with someone if they’re not laughing, then you’re putting your mood and your mindset in their hands. Women don’t like it when you do that.

Think about it this way, when you focus on whether you’re being “funny” or not, you’re making it your goal to make a woman laugh. The problem is, women you when you have goals or agendas that involve them. It means that your mood is dependent on her, instead of dependent on yourself.

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Imagine hanging out with someone who just tried really hard to make you laugh all the time, and was visibly hurt or upset if you didn’t laugh. Wouldn’t it suck to hang out with them? Wouldn’t they become automatically less funny?

The point here is to let go of trying to be funny, and just relax. Focus not on trying to think of something funny to say, but rather on your mood and how you’re feeling at that moment.

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Women are way more attracted to a guy who’s in a genuinely good mood around her than they are of a guy who can just make her laugh. It’s because people who are in a good mood make other people feel good around them, whereas people who can just make other people laugh don’t necessarily do that.

So don’t focus on making people laugh if that’s not your strong suit. It doesn’t have to be. Instead, focus on being relaxed, comfortable, and happy in whatever situation you’re in, and you’ll have more success with women.

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But either way, whatever you choose, make sure to hit someone in the face with a f*cking pie.

Anyone know any good jokes? I will mock you if your joke is bad. Or racist. Don’t tell racist jokes.

And as always, if you’ve got any questions, send ’em here and I’ll answer them with a maximum amount of condescension and insults.

1 comment… add one
  • Oscar September 18, 2017, 6:30 pm

    At first I didn’t realize you were joking in the article. I’m bad at this lol.

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