I’ve been friends with this girl for the last 5 years. We kissed once after having a few drinks and used to hook up every Saturday night. She used to send me a bunch of texts and we hung out a lot. It’s always comfortable and we have fun.
Except, now, she has a boyfriend. She says she can’t talk to me, but will randomly call me to complain about her boyfriend. Is she leading me on? I realized I want to be in a relationship with her. I don’t think she’s happy with her boyfriend, so I wouldn’t feel bad about going for it.
How do I do this in a way where she’ll want to leave her boyfriend and have something with me?
Frank… dude, come on. Why are you trying to break her up with her boyfriend? That’s pretty sh*tty. I don’t think you’re the best judge of whether she’s happy in her relationship or not, considering you want her to break it off and start back up with you.
Let’s look at this logically. Here, I’m going to draw you a flowchart:
You f*ck this girl once a week or so you never consider dating her seriously or making her your girlfriend she gets a boyfriend all of a sudden you want to be in a relationship with her ??? you have to leave the country under a false name and hope they never find the bodies in your backyard.
I put in ??? over the middle part because I don’t know how you’re going to kill her boyfriend, and I don’t want to know.
Sh*t, that was dark. That wasn’t what I wanted you to take away from my awesome flowchart.
Here’s what you should be looking at: you f*cked her once a week and didn’t want to date her, and then she stopped being available for sex and you wanted to date her.
What made you decide you wanted her?
I rubbed the 3 or 4 brain cells left in my head together and they sparked a bit, and I saw it! You didn’t want her when she was available, and you decided you wanted her when she was taken.
Imagine that! A person wanting what they can’t have?! What is this unspeakable nightmare of complexity?
People always want what they can’t have more than the things they can, Frank. It’s why I want to sh*t in a toilet made of solid gold, instead of my crappy regular one with a sh*tty handle that falls off. It probably wouldn’t feel any better to sh*t in a solid gold toilet, but I still want to.
A solid gold toilet wouldn’t actually make my life any better, the same way that being with a girl you didn’t really care about when you could have her wouldn’t actually make your life any better either.
The first step for you is to realize that you want her so badly because you can’t have her. If you really truly wanted her, you would have tried to start a relationship with her while you two were f*cking.
Let’s look at what you’re really asking me here. You asked, “How do I get her to break up with her boyfriend and get with me?” What you’re really asking me is, “What does he have that I don’t? Why did she choose him instead of me?”
Well, the reason is because his cock is bigger than yours. I asked your mother and she told me it was true.
In all seriousness, the real reason doesn’t f*cking matter. Who cares why she’s dating him instead of you? It doesn’t say anything about who you are as a person that she chose him.
Maybe she got tired of waiting for you to start a relationship with her and found someone who would. Maybe his cock really is bigger than yours. Maybe she thinks you are him and she’s living in a constant schizoid nightmare from which there is no awakening.
Or maybe you need to sit back, relax, and stop giving a sh*t why she chose him over you.
She’s calling you to complain about her relationship because she wants to keep you in her back pocket in case things go south with the big-dicked boyfriend. She can sense that you want her more than you used to, and that kind of validation makes her feel good.
It also lets her keep you as ‘just an option’ and leave you dangling on the line. She knows she can break up with this new guy and come back to you any time she wants, because you’re showing her she can.
So what do you do about it?
Well, remember how you got way more attracted to her when she was unavailable? Why don’t you do the same thing?
Stop needing this one woman to dump her boyfriend and get with you to feel good about yourself. Instead, just open yourself up to the possibility of seeing and dating other women. Give up on trying to “win” her away from her boyfriend, and just live your life in a way that feels good to you.
Your need to “win” her is killing her attraction to you. She’d be 10x more attracted to you if you were casually dating other people, and she’d be 100x more attracted to you if you were seriously dating another woman.
The same principle that made you want her would make her want you.
So stop chasing after her! If you really want her to leave her boyfriend, your best bet is to give up on winning her and be open to dating other people. If you’re happy, relaxed, and comfortable with yourself, it’s going to make her way more attracted to you than if you’re chasing after her.
Plus, if you open up to the idea of dating other women, I think you’ll realize that you didn’t really want to date her that badly in the first place. Then, you don’t have to break up her relationship with Big Dick, you get to f*ck new women without being hung up on an unattainable one, and we both get to sh*t in brand new solid gold toilets.
At least, that’s the dream.
Did this make any sense? Do you have questions about it, or do you want to tell me I’m full of sh*t? Leave them below!